Parenting Teens
Step back
Positive parenting for teens requires a long hard look at yourself - you may think your teen too young to manage the things he thinks he is capable of, but now's your time to be the coach, not the parent.
Compromise, negotiate
Think of alternatives which are acceptable to you, and talk through these with your teen. Give them something they want then ask ‘now, what can you give me that I want?' If you feel strongly that your teen should not, for example stay out all night explain why, stand firm but talk about the conditions in the future under which he might be able to do so.
Show them, don't tell them
Screaming, yelling and nagging won't get you the result you're after, will actually break down understanding and make future communication difficult between you. If you've told your teen a thousand times to bring their dirty washing to the washing basket, you will both feel resentful if you then pick it up and do it for them. Show them you're happy to give her this responsibility by leaving her dirty clothes in her room then discuss the matter when she comes to you with no clean clothes.
You can't make me!
Parent power struggles occur when you both dig your heels in. These are detrimental to your relationship, and your personal health. If you're headed towards a ‘YES!', ‘NO!' type argument, back off and say nothing. Leave the room if necessary; go do something fun together for 5 minutes if possible. This is not backing down, this is preparing the ground for a healthier way to discuss and negotiate a solution.
When communication breaks down
Even using positive parenting techniques, families can push each other to the brink. Don't prolong this state of silence, but show him how to make the first move by writing him a note, sending a text or leaving a muffin out for him. It's your relationship which matters here, and discussion is the only route to true understanding.
Read on for more of our great tips on how to be a good parent to newborns, babies, toddlers and kids!